HAPPY VESAK DAY!!!

It's a holiday today! & School's closing for 2 weeks soon! Great! Yesterday, I had Enterprise. We re-shuffled ourselves just like how we did in Science. Hahaha.... Naughty Naughty... We just came up with a reason to stick to whichever group we want. Haha... & yesterday was supposed to be Movie day for W25N, but it was cancelled because very few people are going. Surprisingly, Enterprise ended early. So, I slacked in class & watched Heroes with a few others. Seriously speaking, that was my 1st time watching Heroes, & I'm hooked onto it. Sheesh.... I must find the videos & watch it... =)
& then, went for DCID Bonding Session. Hmm, not bad. But maybe, I'm kinda lonely lah. Nevermind about that.

Ok, let me ask you this. How would you feel, if after you share your form of happiness with someone, she took it away & made it her own? Angry? Well, that's how I feel. I asked someone, who is very close to me, to cheer this person up, since I tried, but to no avail. & then, this someone who is very close to me, somehow was taken away by her, made this person her close friend & left me alone, as if I dont even exist. I mean, if it weren't for me, she would still be unhappy. I'm not being selfish. It's just that the someone who is very close to me, was some form of happiness for me, & this someone easily gets distracted because of her.

I just dont want to lose a close friend. It feels weird. Just like whatever happen before between me & another person who is important to me. It just feels like something is missing. You are smiling, you are happy, but in your heart, it doesnt feel complete when something is wrong between you & someone important to you. Imagine a jigsaw puzzle with 1 piece missing. That's how my heart is feeling...

I don't know what to do. I'll just keep quiet & don't care about her, I guess. Life just has its ups & downs. When you're up, someone will put you down. When you're down, it's hard to get back up.

"With my help,
She's up there,
Sings like an angel.
While I'm lost down here,
with no one to pick me up,
& bring me back up..."

I'm also currently waiting for news. News about whether I'm accepted into SA. Well, I really don't know. I do have thoughts about quitting at times, but now that SA Fund Raising Event is over, I'm beginning to miss them. Each & Every person in MM2. My darlings & eye-candy. The nice people around... I kept on looking at the photos. Whatever the result is, I know I gave my best shot. I'm sure everyone did too... =)

Okayy... Till next time.

END OF SA FUND RAISING EVENT!!! Wohoo! MM2 & MM3 Rawks!! Loove them loads! Of course, I'm more closer to my own MM, which is MM2!!! With bro YaoXing as the OIC, and Lisa as the AIC, I think we did a great job! We're just waiting for the evaluation results. I don't know whether I'm going to end up in SA eventually,but it doesnt matter. Coz' I really enjoyed the process. Getting to know the people, the conflicts & jokes we had, the stress we shared...... Haha... I enjoyed all of it. Thanx, people!!! & then, I'll let the pictures do the talking.

Today, I had Communications. Hmm, I got not much comments. Communication is never boring. Except that the problem trigger today is kinda difficult. Let me ask you:- What is the difference between "I say what I mean" & "I mean what I say"? Hahaha... Confused? Ok, me too. But I finally get what it meant just now... Fun, really. Test how good your English is. Haha...

& then, some problems occurred in SA, but shan't elaborate. I just hope tomorrow is a better day. Sell more, Earn more. Wee~ It's weird. Coz it's 12.15, but Im not a wee bit sleepy... Haiz... I dont know. I just dont feel like sleeping, even though I'm quite tired.

and, tomorrow is Science. Darn it! I dont know why I seem to dislike it, and I also dont know why I always get As for it. Its not a bad thing lah, but it's getting tougher each week & I always couldnt find a solution to the problem. Haiz... But its ok... I'm working hard for it. Oh, & Enterprise is getting better each week. Cool!! Getting As recently. Think creatively & Act Logically... Hahaha... Thats what my sister said. I dont know whether it works. But i think it is. Hahaha...

& thanks to Zul, I'm addicted to this inspirational song by Laura Pausini - The Extra Mile. Surprisingly, if you watch Pokemon, you know, coz its originally from a Pokemon soundtrack. Hahaha... =) Maybe I'll post the music soon. It's just so imspirational. I love it! Thanx, Zul!

Just something random:-

You're the light that makes me shine.
You're the hero in my eyes.
If you know how important our friendship is to me,
If you know how important you are to me,
you'll understand why I hide certain things from you.
I'm prepared to get hurt,
I'm prepared to suffer,
as long as our friendship remains.
I'm not prepared to put our friendship on the line,
if it means i'm going to lose you.

You are my good friend,
my close friend,
my best friend.
I dont know if it will be worthwhile
going the extra mile for you,
but even if it isnt,
i'll still do it,
coz it just shows how much you mean to me.

Till next time, people~ Adios.

U treat me like dirt/shit
while I treat you like a precious stone.
U treat me like a punching bag for you
while I care so much for you.
U dun gif a damn about how I feel
while I wish to know about how you feel.
U said she doesnt know how 2 appreciate the feeling of being loved,
but DO YOU?!

Do you even want to appreciate the feeling of being loved,
or rather ME loving YOU?
Do you even know how to appreciate what I've done for you?
Do you know how much effort I put in to make you happy?
but all you can say is, "What have you done for me? I don't remember."

THANKS! THANKS FOR THAT SENTENCE!
It just shows how much I mean to you.
It just shows how much you care about me.
It just shows how much the things I did mattered to you.

U always look at others.
U always have eyes for others.
U are bothered about how other people look.
but you never look at the one right in front of u.
you never have eyes for the one right in front of u.
you never even bothered about how the one right in front of you looks/feels.

THANKS for the sweet words u said,
THANKS for the sweet things you've done,
THANKS for the sweet memories u gave.
they dont mean anything to you,
its just a normal thing u do/say to girls,
but it meant something to me.

U build me up,
U made me believe in love again,
U made me feel the feeling of love again,
& then, U tear me down,
like an old house waiting to be demolished.

I'm so angry,
angry with you for making me fall for you
angry with me coz I believed ur words when I know Im not supposed to.
I'm hating you,
hating you more than loving you.
This is not how I should feel,
but this is what I want to feel.
I swear, I'm NOT going to be the girl whom you can play around with anymore,
coz this should be where my feelings for you should end.
It hurts, A LOT,
but I have to, coz you never gave me a chance
a chance to believe in my dream
when you know my dream wouldnt come true.

I, MAGHFURAH SALIMEN, will get rid of all the love she has for him, with immediate effect.

Hahaha... I'm smiling all the way home today. I dont know why. I just feel happy. Excited. Glad. Haha... Maybe even the feeling of being loved. Ok, firstly, class started great today! Teri Tan came late. She was only present for the 3rd meeting, so, it wasnt that stressful. Hehe... Great... & then, it became a 2-man job. Coz I asked Doel to accompany SiLing to Causeway Point. Hehe... & he dragged Kwang Nam along. Sheesh...

So, me & Nadiah are left to do the PPT. Went for lunch 1st, then went back class to do. Today happens 2 be Shiying's birthday. Celebrate it with 2 cakes. Yum Yum... I ate lyk 3 slices plus 2 packets of Super Ring. Sheesh... Later fat sia... Hahaha... Then, we did the PPT!!! Wow!!
Was having butterflies in my stomach before the presentation. We scared later we get shoot by the faci. But guess what!!??? WE DIDN'T!!! WE MADE IT THRU WITHOUT ANY QUESTIONS ASKED!!! Instead, she just said, it was clear & to the point. AHHH!!! Me & Nadiah, was like, Thank goodness! Wohoo!! & we rushed to the toilet. Coz it was urgent lah. We were holding it till we end our presentation. Hahaha...

Funny! but we're so so happy!!! Suddenly, I love my team so much. I dowan 2 change team. Please dun change my team!! & then a few problems crop up 2day also. Maybe not 2 me, but to others. Like, my darlings, Natasha & SiLing. I just hope everything's fine. I love my darlings! Dun cry! Be strong! My shoulders are here for you arh! (Of course, i love someone more!)

Oh & to add a bit more 2 the birthday party, we started singing birthday songs in 3 languages. Haha... English, Chinese & Malay. Hehehe... Crazy us! Will update the pics soon. Hahaha... I had a nice time today. Really, coz something sweet happen. At least I tink its sweet, even though its juz a normal act. Hahaha... I love W25N! I love my darlings!

Wee~ Till next time. =) =) =) =) =)

*/i cant give u a reason 2 make u love me. i cant control ur feelings. the only thing i can do is prove my love for u thru my actions.

Now, i'm in class. I'm so damn bored. My team's done with the presentation. So, here I am blogging. I'm feeling so tired. Not physically, but mentally. Maybe I'm thinking too much about certain stuffs. Stuffs which wasnt suppose to be thot abt. I'm trying to put it at the back of my mind arh. Coz my priority is my studies. Heck... I know myself better than anyone else. So, I'll get over it. In the meantime, I dont know whether I shld drop the thought or not. Coz like the malay song I heard, "nak ku tinggalkan terasa sayang, ingin ku belai tangan tak sampai." which means, "i want to leave, but it would be such a waste coz I love him. on the other hand, i cant have him." Ok, it basically means that way lah... A little direct translation. Hehe...

Ahh, enuf. Coz I shall just let things be arh. I cant do anything also. I can only hope for the best. Hope a miracle or sth like dat can happen (even though I know it won't). Im not going to cry on the outside, coz my tears have all dried up before this happens. Im juz crying on the inside, show a stronger side of me on the outside. Life's like that. You meet with setbacks & you just have to face up to reality. =) =)

All I know is, I love him. Thats it. Theres no nid 2 haf a reason for it. Yeap... I cant think of what else to write now lah. Going to have Welfare Day today. Dont know what to expect. I'm mentally tired, & i'm gg 2 get myself physically tired too. Haiz... Now, I just feel like sleeping & forgetting everything. Till next time then. =)

*/prove me wrong will you? i know you wont.

Heyy... Been a few days now, ever since I've blogged. As promised, Im going to talk abt something philosophical or debatable. So, I was on my way home from school the other day, when I saw this group of kids arh. I cant tell whether they are from primary school or secondary school arh, but they were behaving as if they're already adults. It's not that I dont like to see them that way, but I mean, they're still young, and then all the vulgarities & all the wrong words all came out of their mouth, like so easily.

& my friends & I were like just looking at them, smiling to ourselves & shaking our heads at the same time. All their handphones & MP3s all come out of their pockets. They look very young to be in the upper sec, so I guess they are either in the higher primary or lower sec arh. Sheesh... & they are like so full of style in their clothings arh. Even us, poly students, can lose out to them.

I mean, what is going on arh? I feel like I'm in another world now (not literally). Seeing these kids acting big as if they're like adults & not caring about the ppl around them. Sheesh... Now i realise, how the world is changing. Nt just changing but also changing quickly, in fast pace. Even early in the morning, I see working adults walking very fast even though they're not even late & the MRT is not even going to be there in 1 minute. So, you see how fast the world is developing? Even people are affected by it. Hahaha...

Yeahh... Now i finally see the changes in the world & who is affected by it. I cant seem to see it before, maybe because at that time, I need not move as fast as these ppl & tend to take things slow. But now that I'm in poly, I seem to be affected by it, coz I guess, I need to be fast-paced to catch up w/ the world & everything that's changing... How do you feel? The difference between when you were in secondary school & now, in JC/Poly?? Is the difference wide? Generation gap?? There's so many possibilities. (Reminds me when I'm doing a problem statement in school!) Hahaha...

Kayy, give ur comments aites... =) Till next time.

*/if i asked you to stay, would you tell me, you would be mine?

You are so near to me,
but I just cant seem to reach for you.
I talk to you almost everyday,
but I just dont know how You feel towards me.

The songs on my phone keep on playing the same song,
whenever you're around.
Am i fated to be with you?
I doubt so.
Coz I dont know how You feel towards me.

We're very close,
We seldom quarrel,
We are like the best of friends,
but that's all there is to it.

All my troubles go away when I look into your eyes.
You are like my knight in shining armour.
You are the light that shines when I'm in darkness,
but again, that's all there is to it.

I wish I knew what you're thinking,
but I just dont.
I wish I knew how you feel towards me,
but again, I don't.

I wish we could be more than just what we are now,
but I know we cant.
I wish you could hold me tight and never let me go,
but I know you wont.

All I need is you.
But you just dont see it.
I'm falling,
falling deeper & deeper into this.
But I must take myself away,
coz' I know I'll only get myself hurt.

Only you can take all the pain away from me.
Just a few words of love from you,
& I'll surrender.

*in love with you,
but it just wont happen,
& i know it...*

Okayy... School has been great so far... Except for meetings. Hahaha... Had Communication UT 2day. It was okayy. Not dat hard, Not dat easy also... I dont know how I'm going to fare. Science today was ok too. Did something about Pressure. Like, why in a canal, the height of the output of the water, when lower, the water will travel further away from the wall, but when higher, the water will travel nearer to the wall. Hahaha... It was fun lah. All of us were like alliances. We were planning not to do graph correctly, so when 1 team got bombard with questions, all of us will be like supporting them, instead of the faci. Hahaha... Fun, fun... =)

& MM meeting 2day was good 2. Except that some stresses & pressure here & there. But we managed to bring it down a little (we hope!). With Nadia around in the team, the noisy one. Now, I've known 2 Nadiahs. Haha... 1 from my class, another from SA. Both are noisy. & that makes me wonder, are all Nadiahs noisy?? Hahaha... Hmm, dats a question to ponder & investigate. Haha...& she called our OIC, XiaoXing instead of YaoXing. All of us were like laughing lah (joke of the century in MM2!), but YaoXing dont even find it funny... Relate him to Doel... Similar seh... Hahaha... =)

These are just some of the pictures arh... No time to put evrything. We took quite a lot of photos. Ok, briefly, from the top:-
1) My beloved W25N.
2) Me & good friend-cum-class clows, Nadiah.
3) Me & bestie Dixon.
4) Me & darling HuiQi.
5) The 6 malays in class.

Hehe... Maybe I'll update the pics on friendster or my fotopage, if you guys want see more (depends on whether you guys want to see it. If you do, just tag!). Then, I'll update you guys where to view the pics. Okay?!

& people, pray hard, pray very hard that MM2's proposal will be accepted tomorrow! So that there'll be hardly any meetings soon! Hehehe... I cant wait for that. =) I trust YaoXing. He'll do a good job at it. (At the same time, I pity him.) Haha... We'll meet up, but 4 dinner... Hahaha...

Okayy, I guess that's about it. I'm sorry if my entries are not really about philosophies/debatable stuffs. Its just some updates about me. I do have things 2 talk about, but maybe later. Kinda busy at this moment in time to update about more things. But I will. Just check this place out for more updates.

Till next time!

Today seems to suck. This is the first time my friday seem to suck so much. I was feeling damn tired, thought a day out with my friends after school could do some good, but nahh... Outing was cancelled, since everyone had something on. Borrriiiiing....!

Did Cognitive today! According to Ms Viola, we did very well. But I dont know how i fared, or how my team fared. I just think I had a bad day today. Like, I reached Woodlands late to meet my friends coz of the stupid 945 bus. But at least, I had a good talk with darling HuiQi. About the class, health problems & all... (Thanks, HuiQi!!)

But she was damn sick lah... So sent her downstairs & she gave me a panic attack a while. She almost fainted and she just lie down in the middle of the path outside Agora there. WahLao! Panic sia! (Take care arh, HuiQi!!) & then, had meeting. *sigh* Meetings after meetings after meetings, for SA Fund Raising. I'm tired out, but it's all worth it, I hope! I think it's going to be fun.

I already miss hanging out with my friends after school. But it's ok. Coz I think it's for a good cause. I just hope all this can be over soon. The meetings, The event & The Camps. 1 more week of meetings before the event, and 3 camps to attend to during the vacation. I'm looking forward to it actually. Must try to have a positive mindset. Hahaha... I cant wait to have my life back. Time will fly very fast, all this will be over very soon. I am enjoying the process of being under probation. Hahaha....

Ok, very tired now. Dont know what to say. Today seems to be quite a bad day for me. Okayy... Till next time.

My self-reflections or my paranoia? You help me decide. It can be a bit of both also. Now, have you ever wondered or ask yourself, "Why am I born into this world?". Well, I do. You must be thinking what for ask this question. Since I'm already born, so be it. Get ahead with life. But, the reason why I ask myself the question above is because at times, when I come to think of it, I do regret being born.

Its not that I'm not being grateful to be given a life, but reflecting back my life from primary school to secondary school to poly, i dont want to be born. Problems arise since I was in primary school & just when I thought life would be better when I became more matured, things doesnt seem to go my way. Best friends? Close friends? Good friends? How many are true? It's countable for me. As far as I'm concerned, I can only count 3. (Fizah, Zul, AiLing, if you're reading this, you're 1 of them.)

Yeah yeah, I know, true friends are hard to come by. Even now, when I have my cliques, I dont even feel a sense of belonging. Now, my cliques, dont get the wrong idea. I love you ppl a lot. You're the ones I trust most. It's just that, in general, all my friends, those whom Im close with, all have their own friends, 1 which they go the xtra mile 4. 1 which they'll trust wholeheartedly. If you get what I mean.

I neglect others, I do things on my own - It all seems to be my fault. Totally my fault. Why cant I just be myself & let others accept me as who I am? No wonder. Now I finally know the reason why I find myself lonely at times. It's all coz of this. Have friends, seems like no friends. Have ppl I trust, they dont trust me. My life is so full of regrets until I dont feel lyk I should even be born into this world. If im not around, then wont the ppl I meet be more happy? Yes, I know, nobody's perfect. But at least 1 should know their own strengths & weaknesses in friendship.I dont find any strengths in me. I only see the weaknesses that ppl c in me.

Haiz... I really dont know what to do now. Life is predestined. & why must my life be planned diz way? Or maybe why am I brought up diz way? Im nt blaming this on the way my parents brought me up, but you know, its juz a question I ask. Theres no right in whatever I say or do now. Ppl will always look out for the bad in me. & why am I crying over this matter? I've just too many weaknesses to work on. I just want to go & run away. Run far far away & never come back. Then, ppl around me wld lead a better life. I wont trouble others or make mistakes again. Then, nothing would be my fault.

My paranoia? My self-reflections? Or Me being Irrational? I dont know. All I know is, I wish I could turn back time & atone for my mistakes. Then, run to a place where I will hurt no one. Life would be better for everyone that way.

*/i'm going home; back to a place where I belong. (at this time, i dont belong anywhere.)

Ok, I think this entry is going to be so random. Coz just now went home, then me & my bestfriend actually talked about BGR. Its not the normal BGR lah, we talking about the BGR between lyk different races 1. Example like, Chinese guy & Malay gerl or Malay guy & Chinese gerl & stuffs...

Coz my bestfriend is a Chinese guy (as if it's fated, frankly). Seriously speaking, I've never thought of going into a r'ship with him, & i'm 100% CERTAIN he never thought of going into a r'ship w/ a malay gerl also. But just now when we talked abt it, I just realised arh... That I actually dont mind if I go into a r'ship w/ someone of a different race. Of course, there r a lot of things 2 consider arh. Like, the Chinese guy must learn to eat malay food and stuffs. But arh, if 4 me arh, I wouldnt really lyk ask him 2 change juz becoz hes w/ a malay gerl arh. Of coz, I also wouldnt change.

If he wans to try to change, I wld encourage him arh. But 4 me, a malay gerl, I wont even try arh, coz its against my religion. If i ask him 2 change rite, then its lyk no freedom for him & it gives him pressure. Pity him sia, if lyk dat. & changing or even juz trying 2 change is no easy thing 2 do... I mean, if i love him, den i wun even want to hurt him or give him any pressure in stuffs lyk diz arh. See, how nice & caring I am... Hahaha... =)

In anyways, dat was juz something random. School was ok 2day. Sciences. My fave topic - electricity. Hehehe... So smart at this topic. Of course, if you haf LJS drilling you all the time. Hahaha. Those days.... =P Doel became my husband for lyk a few minutes, bt then he screw me up, & took RouWen instead. Sad seh, hahaha. Havant even 1 hour. Hahaha... Coz RouWen & me regard ourselves as rubbish bin. Hahaha. No one wants us also.... Funny.

& tomorrow is Enterprise. Shucks... I hope Doel come 2 school tmr. If not, its only Nadiah & me & KwangNam working & it sucks big time. Really... Kayy, till next time. Feeling quite high 2day arh. Dunno why. Maybe coz i did my fave topic in Science 2day. Hehehe... =) Take care ppl!

Ok. I seriously dont know whats wrong with Blogger. Is it Blogger or is it my lappy? I hope its not my lappy. Loove my lappy a lot. Hopefully, nothing goes wrong with it. Anyways, here to update abt yesterday & today. Hmm, yesterday, school was okay. Had Viola's lesson. Hehe... Problem statement wasnt that tough. Its just do-able. So, yeap yeap... Hopefully, a better grade this time, coz my 1st C came from her lesson. Disappointing C there... =S

After that went hanging out with RouWen, good-&-close-fren Dixon & darling HuiQi. Haha.. At first at a loss of where to go. Then, plan to go window shopping for backpack. So, off to Far East instead. We chatted, laughed & joked around. Hahaha... It was fun. So far, the only backpack that caught my eye was the one at Far East. I dont know how to call the bag lah. But it was somehow the last shop we went to at the basement. Quite a small shop. But the bags were unique. Hardly seen anybody using it. Hmm, maybe will go again this week to find out the price. =) =)

Then, went to Heeren. Walk around. Chat & finally had dinner at Swensens. Hahaha. Acting like rich kids eh?? Having good food almost every week. Seriously, I'm bankrupt now. Really bankrupt. Used to have like a minimum of 40 bucks in my wallet everyday. Now, I dont even haf a minimum of 10 bucks. Thanks to all those darlings of mine who owes me money. Hahaha. But I still love them... =) Then, I went to Cathay to meet my Sis. Since Dad's picking us home. We "disturbed" SiLing who was working at the basement, but we became her saviour instead. Hahaha... Coz we gave her jacket when she was freakin cold. Hahaha...

& then, I went home. Today, my slacking day. Sit at home, watch tv, sleep, eat, play comp. Hahaha. & today is Granny's birthday too. So, went to her house to visit. Lazy at first, but just go ahead since its Mom's decision. =P Ate, chat, played & watch tv there. Oh & for your info, remember I told you once, I signed up for SA? Oh wells, I was rejected at first, but then was accepted. Hahaha. Looking forward to a busy time ahead, what with proposals, camps & stuffs. I have like 3 camps 2 attend to in June. 2 for SLC & 1 for SA. So, now I'm partially a member of SA. Haish... But the sad thing is not all 5 of us got thru. Dixon & BoShen didnt get thru. Sad... Nvm, hope we'll still be as close. Ok, guys?? =) 6 of us will still be 6 of us (I hope?).

Im always looking 4ward 2 school now. W25N just rawks. However, I think I need to change the way I think. Should think creatively now & start solving problems. Shouldnt always rely on others & should give more reasonable opinions. Dats PBL. Thats the way you should think - OUT OF THE BOX. Okayy, I think I wrote quite a lot.

Till next time.

*/I keep dreaming you'll be with me & you'll never go. Can you make my dream come true 1 day?

Ignore the previous entry again. Haha. And ignore the title of this entry. I just came up with a word that came to mind. In anyways, this entry might have something about my favourites also.Haha...

First things first. School today was great. Computing & Mathematical Methods became my favourite module. Hahaha. 1) It's so fun discovering things & the excitement you get after the discovery is undescribable. 2) The faci is kinda nice (& good-looking!) Hahaha...

Today, we did Bouncing Box. Where when we click the arrow and the start button, the box will go to the direction & keep on moving until we press stop. Hehehe... Cool. I like it a lot a lot. Whatsmore with Dee keeping the spirits high!! Or maybe only mine. Haha.
& then, with her usual jokes & stuff, she just said to the faci, Mr Chua that he's handsome. Hahaha. Which is true. I laughed so hard! But its a good wayto relieve stress arh. Really. Dee! Good to have you around! Hahaha...

I cant even last a day not thinking about you.
You are always a part of me.
But it seems that I'm not even apart of your life now
Now that you have her.
Now that you've found someone new.
I wish things need not turn out this way.
I really do coz
I miss you,
I love you
& I need you.

Till Next Time.

Thank You.
Thank You for all that you've said.
Thank You for your sincerity.
Thank You for your love.
Thank you for all the memories.

Thank You for melting my hardened heart.
Thank You for making me whole again.
and lastly, Thank You for breaking my heart again.

I'm not who I use to be.
I'm not the girl whom you think you can please
with all the sweet nothings.
While you have found someone else,
I'm stranded here with nothing but memories.

You said what I want to hear to someone else.
You gave the only form of happiness I had to someone else.
How could you?
You knew I need you.
You knew my true feelings for you.
Still, you remained ignorant,
& gave your heart to someone else.

I guess, It's time.
Time for me to move on.
It's hard.
Very hard for me.
But I'll still try.
Coz I realise,
If you are meant to be mine,
you will be mine.
If you're not meant to be mine,
I should just learn to let go.
& letting go is what I'm trying to do now.

by yours truly.